


Going Home

by lol-phan-af (lol_phan_af)



Series: 1-800-did-I-ask [41]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Multi, Texting, Vacation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-05
Updated: 2016-08-05
Packaged: 2018-07-29 14:15:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,288
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7687684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lol_phan_af/pseuds/lol-phan-af
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>little lion: THEY HAVE HOGWARTS HOUSE SWEATERS</p><p>little lion: THEYRE SO MUCH MONEY THO</p><p>johnn: I'll buy mine and hercules' if you buy yours and lafayette's</p><p>little lion: DEAL</p>
            </blockquote>





	Going Home

**laf** : I feel like your parents hate us  
  
**more like HUNKules** : they don't??  
  
**laf** : how do you know  
  
**more like HUNKules** : bc they always text me after they see you telling me how nice you are  
  
**laf** : whAT  
  
**more like HUNKules** : yeAH LIKE MY MOM WILL TEXT ME ABT IT LIKE TRUST ME THEY DONT HATE YOU  
  
**hugh lowercase** : I can confirm this she puts it in our fam group chat  
  
**little lion** : you have a family group chat??  
  
**more like HUNKules** : yeah but we don't use it that often  
  
**laf** : okay so your parents don't hate us  
  
**more like HUNKules** : no  
  
**laf** : good  
  
**laf** : anyway we're in the restaurant now lets go lets go  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : the table keeps moving but I don't want to say anything  
  
**hugh lowercase** : I get to sit at the head of the table I feel powerful  
  
**little lion** : watch yourself  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : okay we have to have this argument here bc we're all yelling  
  
**laf** : CHEESECAKE  
  
**little lion** : CHOCOLATE CHEESECAKE ARE YOU KIDDING  
  
**laf** : N O  
  
**hugh lowercase** : IM NOT ABOUT CHOCOLATE CHEESECAKE  
  
**johnn** : WHO THE FUCK ISNT ABOUT CHOCOLATE CHEESECAKE  
  
**johnn** : ITS THE BEST THING THAT MANKIND HAS EVER CREATED BESIDES LIKE  
  
**johnn** : JUST PLAIN CHOCOLATE  
  
**more like HUNKules** : RT  
  
**hugh lowercase** : WE ARE NO LONGER BROTHERS  
  
**more like HUNKules** : HUGH YOU'RE LITERALLY HURTING ME RN  
  
**hugh lowercase** : ITS NOT GOOD  
  
**more like HUNKules** : YES IT IS WHAT THE FUUKXJKCJKFKCK  
  
**little lion** : I DID IT  
  
**laf** : I WANT A DIVORCE  
  
**johnn** : ILL MARRY YOU  
  
**laf** : no wait I take it back alex is mine  
  
**little lion** : sharing is caring my dears  
  
**little lion** : ALSO CHOCOLATE CHEESECAKE 5EVER  
  
**laf** : tHIS IS BETRAYAL  
  
**little lion** : hA TOO BAD  
  
**laf** : RUDE  
  
\---  
  
**hugh lowercase** : update: this is the best thing I have ever eaten  
  
**little lion** : hA  
  
**johnn** : we shOULDVE BET MONEY ON IT  
  
**more like HUNKules** : TRUE  
  
**laf** : my original statement of hatred still stands  
  
**little lion** : you literally moaned when you ate it you aren't fooling aNYONE  
  
**laf** : fucK YOU  
  
**little lion** : no homo  
  
**laf** : wE ARE ENGAGED  
  
\---  
  
**more like HUNKules** : we have like 15 minutes to kill before mom and dad get here  
  
**little lion** : okay then I'm buying more cheesecake and also ricotta cookies bc those are bOMB  
  
**johnn** : I'll come with you  
  
**little lion** : !!!  
  
\---  
  
**more like HUNKules** : why is there two peices of this cheesecake already missing  
  
**little lion** : you were outside waiting for your parents  
  
**little lion** : me and john were inside getting forks and Attacking  
  
**more like HUNKules** : we were only out there for literally five minutes  
  
**little lion** : yes notice how I said Attacking instead of undressing it slowly with my eyes and then ravaging it on the beach while the sun sets  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I have no words  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : WHICH ONE OF YOU FUCKERS  
  
**laf** : SNUCK DOWN HERE BEFORE ME  
  
**laf** : AND ATE THE REST OF THIS CHEESECAKE  
  
**little lion** : guilty  
  
**johnn** : same  
  
**more like HUNKules** : W HA T  
  
**hugh lowercase** : oops?  
  
**laf** : whaT THE FUCKKC  
  
**little** **lion** : soRRY??  
  
**laf** : MY OWN HUSBAND  
  
**little lion** : ITS SO GOOD LAF  
  
**more like HUNKules** : HOW DID YOU GET OUT OF BED  
  
**johnn** : we like wormed down to the bottom of it and escaped  
  
**johnn** : hugh caught us escaping so we bribed him with two pieces of cheesecake to not tell you  
  
**laf** : IM LITERALLY SO OFFENDED  
  
**more like HUNKules** : RT  
  
**little lion** : SORORY  
  
**johnn** : IM NOT  
  
**johnn** : YOU CANT JUST RESIST THE TEMPTATION OF CHEESECAKE  
  
**laf** : >:^((((  
  
**more like HUNKules** : :^(((  
  
**little lion** : <3 <3 <3  
  
**johnn** : <3 <3 <3  
  
**laf** : :^))))  
  
**more like HUNKules** : :^))))  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : wait a minute why was lafayette sneaking into the kitchen alone to eat the cheesecake  
  
**johnn** : that's the real fuckin question  
  
**laf** : ,,,,,,,,,  
  
**laf** : shouldn't we be asleep  
  
**little lion** : WOW  
  
\---  
  
**hugh lowercase** : BEACH DAY SIX  
  
**little lion** : okay question  
  
**little lion** : do we have to go to the beach today  
  
**hugh lowercase** : well I mean it is a beach trip  
  
**little lion** : I know but it's a beACH  
  
**little lion** : there's sand, there's water, there's making out with hercules on the blanket when your parents aren't looking, there's my hair absorbing so much heat from the sun that you could fry eggs on it  
  
**little lion** : other than that ??  
  
**hugh lowercase** : I  
  
**hugh lowercase** : what else would we do  
  
**laf** : we could just stay inside and enjoy the feeling of not sweating  
  
**hugh lowercase** : oh true  
  
**more like HUNKules** : we leave tomorrow tho don't you want like one last beach experience  
  
**laf** : no  
  
**little lion** : literally  
  
**more like HUNKules** : well okay then  
  
**laf** : wake john up and ask him  
  
**laf** : NOT LIKE THAT GET YOUR MOUTH NORTH OF THE EQUATOR RIGHT NOW  
  
**little lion** : fiNE IF YOU WANNA BE BORING  
  
**laf** : HHDSJHJSKFH  
  
\---  
  
**johnn** : popcorn for breakfast!!  
  
**more like HUNKules** : honestly I don't agree  
  
**more like HUNKules** : but you look really cute so I'll go with it  
  
**johnn** : omg I love you  
  
**more like HUNKules** : love you too  
  
**little lion** : how long do you put this popcorn in for I'm literally sweating  
  
**hugh lowercase** : he won't trust me that it's 2 and a half minutes  
  
**little lion** : THIS IS LIKE A HEAVY DUTY MICROWAVE HOW WOULD YOU KNOW  
  
**hugh lowercase** : POPCORN IS ALWAYS SOMEWHERE AROUND THERE  
  
**little lion** : POPCORN IS A SCIENCE  
  
**hugh lowercase** : N O ?  
  
**little lion** : FINE WE'LL PUT IT IN FOR YOUR AMOUNT OF TIME AND SEE IF IT LIVES  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : IT BURNED  
  
**hugh lowercase** : I DONT KNOW HOW  
  
**johnn** : I'm literally on the couch watching them mourn this burnt bag of popcorn this is hilarious  
  
**laf** : I shower for ten minutes and get out to this  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I'm hiding on the porch  
  
**laf** : I'm honestly scared  
  
**johnn** : you should be  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : popcorn trials part two: 2 minutes, 5 seconds  
  
**hugh lowercase** : mr. mulligan is doubtful that this experiment won't result in all kernel failure  
  
**little lion** : mr. hamilton is not doubtful and points out that mr. mulligan was wrong before and that we are correcting his mistake  
  
**johnn** : mr. laurens watches in fear from the couch  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : TRIAL SUCCESSFUL!!!!  
  
**little lion** : MR. HAMILTON IS VICTORIOUS  
  
**hugh lowercase** : mr. mulligan is bitter  
  
**more like HUNKules** : mr. mulligan 2 is coming inside  
  
**laf** : I'm still afraid  
  
**little lion** : we're on an honorific thing rn you can't just not do it  
  
**laf** : mx. lafayette is afraid  
  
**little lion** : sometimes I forget that lafayette is your last name  
  
**laf** : that's understandable  
  
**little lion** : ALSO COME OUT HERE AND EAT POPCORN WITH US  
  
**laf** : COMING  
  
\---  
  
**johnn** : what are we doing tonight  
  
**little lion** : I wanna go to the bookstore  
  
**johnn** : what bookstore  
  
**little lion** : there's one across the street from That Bar and lafayette wouldn't let me go in it bc I would ""waste all of my money"" and ""die""  
  
**johnn** : they're not wrong  
  
**little lion** : w/e  
  
**more like HUNKules** : we could go go karting  
  
**hugh lowercase** : oh true  
  
**little lion** : go karts!!!  
  
**johnn** : oh god  
  
**laf** : I have never been  
  
**little lion** : neither have I but like  
  
**little lion** : go karts!!!  
  
**laf** : I  
  
**more like HUNKules** : okay so we go to the bookstore at like 8 go to the go karts place at like 8:30  
  
**little lion** : go karts @8  
  
**little lion** : bookstore at 6  
  
**hugh lowercase** : do you really need two hours in a bookstore  
  
**little lion** : two hours is like literally 20 minutes in bookstore time  
  
**hugh lowercase** : yeah okay that's true  
  
**little lion** : exactly  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : okay so I want funnel cakes  
  
**laf** : so I will get to the bookstore after that  
  
**laf** : hercules come with me bc idk how to navigate this boardwalk  
  
**more like HUNKules** : okay  
  
**little lion** : don't get lost  
  
**laf** : I'll try  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : THEY HAVE HOGWARTS HOUSE SWEATERS  
  
**little lion** : THEYRE SO MUCH MONEY THO  
  
**johnn** : I'll buy mine and hercules' if you buy yours and lafayette's  
  
**little lion** : DEAL  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : yeah we're lost  
  
**johnn** : jfc  
  
**laf** : I'm not good aT THIS  
  
**more like HUNKules** : WE'RE NOT THAT LOST WE JUST DONT KNOW HOW FAR WE HAVE TO WALK TO GET TO THIS BOOKSTORE  
  
**laf** : I also have to sit outside bc I will get powdered sugar Everywhere  
  
**laf** : it's in my nails  
  
**johnn** : okay well we're like kind of almost done bc I'm putting alex on a six book limit and he has four  
  
**laf** : how much money do you think he's spent so far  
  
**johnn** : around $150  
  
**laf** : jesus fuck  
  
\---  
  
**johnn** : final bill total: $196.73  
  
**laf** : oh my GOD  
  
**hugh lowercase** : I'm afraid and also kind of impressed  
  
**johnn** : you shouldn't be he's literally sweating  
  
**little lion** : that was sO MUCH MONEY  
  
**johnn** : you still have books in boxes in the spare room that you haven't read  
  
**little lion** : I kNOW BUT THESE ONES LOOKED NICE  
  
**johnn** : you worry me  
  
**laf** : same  
  
**more like HUNKules** : rt  
  
\---  
  
**hugh lowercase** : GO KARTS  
  
**more like HUNKules** : HERE WE GO  
  
**little lion** : there is Nobody here  
  
**more like HUNKules** : yeah that's good it means that we'll get like the whole track to ourselves  
  
**little lion** : oh rad  
  
**more like HUNKules** : never do that again  
  
**little lion** : frick ya  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : BEING TALL ON THOSE THINGS WAS LITERAL HELL  
  
**johnn** : DOESNT MATTER BC IM THE WINNER  
  
**hugh lowercase** : THERE ISNT EVEN A WINNER WE JUST DROVE IN CIRCLES  
  
**johnn** : SOMEONES BITTER  
  
**hugh lowercase** : ENDLESSLY  
  
**more like HUNKules** : THAT WAS FUN THO  
  
**little lion** : I CRASHED SO MANY TIMES  
  
**johnn** : YOU DID AND IM SORRY FOR CRASHING INTO YOU THAT ONE TIME  
  
**little lion** : oh that's fine this really attractive worker guy had to turn my car around  
  
**johnn** : well Okay Then  
  
\---  
  
**johnn** : my legs hurt from go karting  
  
**more like HUNKules** : well it's a good thing that you won't be standing then  
  
**johnn** : oh right we're going home in like two hours  
  
**little lion** : can we go to the candy store on our way home  
  
**more like HUNKules** : yeah my dad likes to buy like a scary amount of saltwater taffy so  
  
**little lion** : okay good  
  
**laf** : okay so none of you are packed except for hugh  
  
**laf** : SO LETS GO  
  
**little lion** : coming mOM  
  
**laf** : BLOCKED  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : laf got the fucking receipt star again  
  
**laf** : I honestly think I'm god  
  
**johnn** : oh my god  
  
**laf** : Yes?  
  
**johnn** : nO  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : john and alex are asleep  
  
**more like HUNKules** : so is hugh  
  
**more like HUNKules** : both my brother and my dad  
  
**laf** : I wanna lean on you but you're up there  
  
**more like HUNKules** : go to sleep  
  
**more like HUNKules** : we'll probably be almost home by the time you wake up  
  
**laf** : okay  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : update: I can't fall asleep  
  
**laf** : alex and john are still asleep I love them  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I can't fall asleep either  
  
**laf** : we can suffer together!!  
  
**more like HUNKules** : or we could get my mom to turn the music up full blast and wake everyone up at once  
  
**laf** : I vote we do that  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : ""mom hand me the aux cord and turn it up full volume"" me  
  
**more like HUNKules** : this is bullying  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : JESUS FUCKING CHRIST  
  
**laf** : WE'RE NO STRANGERS TO LOooOve  
  
**more like HUNKules** : YOU KNOW THE RULES  
  
**laf** : and SO do I  
  
**more like HUNKules** : A FULL COMMIMENT'S WHAT IM THINKING OF  
  
**laf** : YOU WOULDNT GET THIS FROM ANY OTHER GUY  
  
**little lion** : says the person who has three boyfriends  
  
**johnn** : accompanied by the man who has three signifs  
  
**more like HUNKules** : IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII JUST WANNA TELL YOU HOW IM FEELING  
  
**laf** : GOTTA MAKE YOU UNDERSTAND  
  
**more like HUNKules** : NEVER GONNA YOU UP  
  
**laf** : NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWN  
  
**more like HUNKules** : NEVER GONNA RUN AROUND AND DESERT YOU  
  
**laf** : NEVER GONNA MAKE YOU CRY  
  
**more like HUNKules** : NEVER GONNA SAY GOODBYE  
  
**laf** : NEVER GONNA TELL A LIE  
  
**more like HUNKules** : AND HURT YOU  
  
**johnn** : these are wedding vows  
  
**little lion** : you're going to give them ideas  
  
**johnn** : fuck  
  
**johnn** : DISREGARD EVERYTHING I SAID  
  
**laf** : tOO LATE GET READY TO CRY AT OUR WEDDING  
  
**little lion** : LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE  
  
**johnn** : SORORYRYR  
  
\---  
  
**more like HUNKules** : hugh slept through that  
  
**more like HUNKules** : BOTH MY DAD AND MY BROTHER SLEPT THROUGH THAT  
  
**johnn** : HWAT THE FUCK  
  
**laf** : HOW  
  
**little lion** : I'm honestly afraid  
  
**little lion** : I'm also really tired but I'm afraid to sleep bc of you two  
  
**laf** : sorry  
  
**more like HUNKules** : we're like almost home  
  
**little lion** : how long were we asleep for  
  
**laf** : like three hours  
  
**little lion** : okay  
  
**little lion** : I'm going back to bed anyway and if any of you wake me up before we're at the ferry fucker thing I will gouge your eyeballs out  
  
**laf** : sweet  
  
**little lion** : gOODNIGHT  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : alex juST TRIPPED OVER HIS SUITCASE WHEELS AND FELL ON THE FLOOR  
  
**laf** : WHERE ARE YOU  
  
**johnn** : HERCULES IS PAYING RN  
  
**laf** : HES LIKE ASLEEP ON THE FLOOR AND HE WONT GET UP  
  
**johnn** : PICK HIM UP??  
  
**laf** : HES LITERALLY ASLEEP  
  
**little lion** : lies I amin fact awake  
  
**laf** : babe  
  
**little lion** : jstu ehlp me off od thr floro  
  
**laf** : oh my god  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : HOME! HOME! HOME! HOME! HOME!  
  
**johnn** : shshhshhhhhshhshshhshhshshhshshshhshhhhhhshsh  
  
**johnn** : bed  
  
**johnn** : let's go  
  
**more like HUNKules** : rt  
  
**laf** : you people are so unappreciative of this moment  
  
**johnn** : yes we are but me and hercules had to lug up two suitcases bc our alexander is asleep in your arms  
  
**laf** : thank you for that  
  
**johnn** : w/e  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I will lock our bedroom door and you will sleep in the hallway  
  
**laf** : we have a pull out couch  
  
**more like HUNKules** : yeah but I'm not on the pull out couch  
  
**johnn** : true  
  
**more like HUNKules** : so like  
  
**more like HUNKules** : coME ON  
  
**johnn** : viniendo  
  
**laf** : j'arrive  
  
**more like HUNKules** : wow okay  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I see how it is

**Author's Note:**

> soz if the ending seems rushed!!


End file.
